As it gets closer to the New Year, I have been hearing more and more of my customers say, “I am so looking forward to this year ending. 2009 sucked!” Lets face it, 2009 was probably not the best year for anyone. But I say screw that attitude! Lets find some positives here, I mean 2009 hasn’t been all bad right? I’m still in business. That’s an amazing feat for a new venture during this time. And I am sure there are many other things that happened in your life in 2009 that didn’t completely suck. They can be small and insignificant, but in the end it all adds up to “not that bad”. Or “could have been worse”. Here are a few of mine:
I didn’t step on a nail in 2009
I didn’t get the swine flu in ‘09
I didn’t get raped, murdered or robbed
I didn’t get injured in a train crash
I didn’t have anyone spit on me in 2009
I didn’t drown in my parents pool
I didn’t get hit by a runaway bus
I didn’t get suffocated by a plastic bag
I was never admitted into a psych ward in 2009
I didn’t receive any strange facial lacerations
I didn’t fall into a well
I didn’t loose any appendages in 2009
I didn’t glue my fingers to my face
I didn’t have any ex-employees come bursting through the doors here going postal
I didn’t vomit in public
I didn’t pass out during spin class
I didn’t ride my bike off a cliff
I didn’t crack my head open on our tile stairs in the kitchen
I didn’t get bit by the black widow that lives in my mail box
And I made it through the year of 2009 STD free.
In 2009 I experienced a taste of freedom for the first time that has been both exhilarating and exhausting. I have made friendships that are stronger and more remarkable then any I have ever experienced in the past. I have become closer to my children, watched them grow, learn and experience life. And I have worked diligently at keeping my head afloat in the midst of a whirlwind business, all while managing 16 wild employees, keep a cool head (most times) and continue to build on. And am still loving it more and more everyday.
So if 2009 was one of our worst years, but we can somehow manage to find a little ray of happiness in it, think of what might be possible for 2010. Because you can’t enjoy the sunshine without a little rain.
peace.love.food.
SN
get your crush on in 2010!!!
“…men would rather be trampled by elephants on fire then tell a woman he is just not that into her…There is no need for elephants here. Take care and see you around.” That is a real text I recently sent someone. The beginning is a quote from the book, “He’s just not that into you.” Is it just me or do you ever have days when you wish you could pick a date from a glass case, kind of like picking a cupcake? Maybe even try 3 or 4, but knowing no matter which one you pick, you are going to be pleasantly surprised. You can’t go wrong with any of them.
Match, Yahoo personals, eHarmony, they are as close as you are going to get to picking a man from a glass case. And I can tell you first hand, I was rarely pleasantly surprised by any I have ever picked, let alone tasted. Ha ha! But here is the thing, relationships are already hard, especially trying to start one from scratch, so why do we make it even harder by saying things we don’t mean like, “Yes, I will call you!” “I cant wait to see you this weekend!” “I have been thinking about you for days!” Lets be honest here, why go through the motions knowing it will never happen? Maybe the cupcakes have it right. They stand out on their trays, nothing to hide, allowing us to stare without ever turning away. Proud of who they are, daring you to take a bite. Knowing that in the end you will fall in love…
So here is what I propose. If we look at dating the same way we look at cupcakes, maybe we can find a way to make this a more pleasurable experience for everyone:
1) Spend quality time searching for the right one. Look closely at all of the different shapes, sizes and colors. Keep an open mind. Know that inside they are all the same, they only look different from the outside. Don’t go towards the one you think you should have (is there a low fat cupcake in here?) or the one you think you mother wants you to have (chocolate dear, its just like your grandmothers) or the one your friends are pushing you to take (get the cookies and cream, its the most popular, everyone is doing it!), pick the one you really want.
2) Treat your cupcake lovingly. Spend time with it, get to know it better. Only then will you truly appreciate it.
3) Before you consider opening its wrapper, make sure the time is right. Maybe you are still full from dinner and you will not be able to enjoy it the way you should. Wait just a little longer.
4) When you feel the time is right, lovingly remove the paper. Take a moment to smell the frosting, feel the softness of the cake, notice the time spent on dressing it up with pretty sprinkles just for you. Gently take that first bite, feel the moist cake against your lips. Dig in, don’t be shy. Lick the wrapper. Finish what you started. Take it to the happy ending.
5) Savor the moment.
Now wasn’t that a more satisfying experience? No need to lie. No need to say things you didn’t mean. No need to worry if the cupcake would still be there for you in the morning. We will keep making more. Show us love, commitment and honesty and we will never leave you. I promise.
peace.love.food.
SN
As I sit in my backyard looking up at a shooting star streaking across the dark sky, goosebumps spreading up my dripping arms while I escape the steaming jacuzzi, I think to myself, what do I wish for this holiday season? How about a new car? Expanded business growth? A trip to Italy? And then I realize that I do this every year, I wish for such grand, sometimes unattainable dreams. Why not just want for a new pair of fuzzy socks or an amazing meal with friends and family?
A brilliant man once said, “You can’t always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you might just get what you need.” For my holiday wish, and for my 2010, I hope to discover what more I need from this life. I mean really need. Because we often think we already know what our needs are, we attain them, and its not at all what we had hoped for. Figuring it out is the hard part. It takes time. Patience. Understanding. Courage to see beyond what we desire in the moment. Sex, steak, tequila, whatever it may be, let it wait. Forget about it. Focus.
I get emails almost once a week asking me if I will talk about the success of Crushcakes. I have never obliged. It seems nearly impossible to open up and reveal this information, even to myself. Crushcakes was a need so strong it is nearly unexplainable. A force so complete that every decision was made before I could even say it out loud. Knowing what had to be done before I ever put pen to paper. Never questioning the validity of my own ideas, even among the boldest of critics. Smiling, nodding and going on my way. Remaining perpetually positive despite set backs. Opening a shop with $2 left in a bank account and knowing without a doubt I was doing the right thing. This is a need beyond any other. Find a way to channel every bit of energy and momentum and make it happen. Understand that every thing you own is on the table to be lost. Or gained. And be ok with that.
Do you have it in you? I always knew I did, I just had to discover it. And that is the journey of our lifetime. Because I am not done yet.
peace.love.food.
SN
Recently I was nearly sued for the use of the phrase, “make cupcakes, not war”. This phrase is actually trademarked by a company called Johnny Cupcakes. Johnny makes apparel with pictures of cupcakes on it, but he does not make any cupcakes. He has ovens in his shops but they are full of tee shirts, not warm goodies. He has refrigerators and bakery cases, but they are filled with jewelry, wallets and hats, not delicious treats. Johnny has this phrase “make cupcakes not war” so tightly protected that I have been advised that I cannot use anything even remotely close. Phrases such as “make Crushcakes not war” or “make cookies not war” or “make brownies not war” or even “make minis not war” are all off the table. I have been told that if I even attempt to try to use any of these phrases, they are prepared to fight any legal battle. In my efforts to negotiate with the folks at Johnny Cupcakes, they generously agreed to allow me to sell out my tee shirt and bumper sticker inventory with their phrase on it as long as I made a donation to a non-profit charity of their choice. I thought this a very kind compromise, however, it did leave a gap in my cool tee shirt collection.
During my negotiations with Johnny, I got a very interesting email regarding my use of the phrase “make cupcakes not war”. The person who sent me this message is clearly an avid reader of my blog, as they noticed a one word change I made to a posting within hours of me doing so. And commented on it. But here is the thing, the email to me was very passionate, very thoughtful, very clear and very concise. Their point being that war is in fact necessary and the use of cupcakes as an alternative is simply ludicrous. They sited the reasons why using cupcakes to fight the Nazis would have been a ridiculous notion. She or he went on to state, “I am interested in Kim Jong Il’s (FYI: North Korea’s dictator) reaction to a million “red commie velvet cupcakes”. I actually laughed, I mean it is funny when you think about it right? Even funnier that he or she had to give me that little “fyi”, as if I don’t know who Kim Jong Il is. But what he or she doesn’t get, and may never get as we are on such opposite sides of the spectrum on this, is that we who believe in this phrase, who fight for it so hard that we are willing so spend thousands on legal fees to keep it our own, is that we don’t actually believe in using cupcakes to fight our battles. Similar to John Lennon and Bob Marley using the phrase “make love not war” in their inspirational songs of the seventies, they did not actually want to throw people making love at the Vietnamese. Just like I don’t want to bomb Afghanistan with cupcakes. What we want is to behave as humans in a manner which we were taught as young children. What we learned starting in preschool and continued throughout our school age years. Until we grew into adults and suddenly fighting became an option. Not only fighting but killing. What happened to “use your words” or “get along well with others” or “say please and thank you”. Are all of those lessons suddenly meaningless? I’m not saying, as the many others who espouse to this famous phrase, that war is never necessary. But in the case of Iraq? Please. And Conservatives hate this question, but where is Osama??? Seriously.
So when we say, “make cupcakes not war”, what we are really saying is, can we try to put some effort into working through our differences without resorting to killing men, women and children first? I know its hard, as Bush liked to say, “This is hard work”. Yes it is. But that is why you are in that position, so work harder.
And regarding my use of “make cupcakes not war”, well this is the end for me. But don’t you worry, a new one is coming, its on the way, and will be here shortly. But I’m sure my conservative readers will not like it any better.
peace.love.food.
SN
Yesterday I went down to L.A. to have dinner with Jasmine. Aside from enjoying an evening with one the most influential and important people in my life, it was certainly the most inspiring meal I have had in a long time. The restaurant was picked by Jas, she had eaten there once before and knew how much I would appreciate their bold menu of unique and interesting choices. The energy and vibe of the big city surrounding us automatically drove my mind into new corners of thought. And there is something about the chemistry between Jas and I that gets us talking and creating and imagining different and exciting possibilities for Crushcakes. We talked for hours, non stop, and when we were done, I had filled lines and lines of notepad on my iphone. New creations for the cafe, special cupcakes to bake, innovative marketing ideas, more productive ways to handle crazy employee situations…
Then it was time to say goodbye , we gave our hugs and promises to see each other soon (and I swore to myself that I would not cry). I sat in my car, wanting to add a couple more notes to my pad, but my iphone was gone! I went into a complete frenzy, throwing about clothes I had just purchased, nearly breaking an antique cake plate I just bought for crushcakes, tossing aside books, papers, receipts, my wallet, all in search of my phone. I ran into the restaurant, causing a complete scene, panicked and nearly in tears. I had these poor people get up out of their chairs twice so that I could crawl about under the table, sure it had slipped out of my purse and was hidden underneath. I finally slinked away, in defeat, back to my car. It was gone. Forever.
Since I have been single for the last several months, my iphone and I have developed a very intimate relationship. It is everything I have ever wanted in a person and have not yet been able to find. It makes me happy when times are tough, playing me all of my favorite music from itunes or Pandora. It reminds me, without nagging, about calender events I must attend. It sends me my texts and emails without me having to ask twice. It makes me feel pretty with the perfect pictures it takes. It lets me drone on and on about my every thought in its note section without any judgment. Its always there when I need it. Its awake and ready to go at a moments notice. It vibrates. And it always recharges its batteries.
I had to find it. In one last effort, I searched my floor boards, and there it was. Sleek and black in its beauty. Waiting for me to find it, as if to say, “I have been here all along, you just had to open your eyes.” Maybe that is the key, opening my eyes to all that is around me, to be inspired, to be moved, to feel the passion, the joy in life. I thought about it the entire drive home, how sometimes it feels like we are continually searching for more, never quite satisfied with what we already have. Not even sure about what we really want but still searching for the unknown. But what I realized last night, my iphone securely in my hip pocket, I already have it all. I need to stop looking and enjoy all that is here, all that is real, all that surrounds me each and every day.
peace.love.food.
SN
This friend of mine is relentless about a particular issue she has with me. Every time I see her she lets me have it, “I don’t mean to tell you how to run your business, but I really think you should consider removing your blog from your business web site.” Her thoughts are that I am sharing too much. I am telling the world more then you need to know about me, about my staff and about what really goes on behind the big white walls. I usually just shrug it off. But recently it seems that my blog has gotten a little more attention then usual so I am feeling the need to defend myself.
Everyone has their art, their passion, their reason for living. For me, I have been writing since I can remember. I wrote my first book on pages and pages of spiral bound notebook paper using a ballpoint pen at the age of 10. And I have been cooking and baking since I was …well, I don’t even know. Both of my parents worked full time, my mom as a nurse and my dad in the restaurant biz. Sometimes my younger brother and I had to fend for ourselves. I learned how to cut a whole chicken before I wrote my first book. I prepared steaks, soups, potatoes, eggs, you name it. I especially enjoyed using my moms old Kitchen Aid mixer, even if it did deliver a shock every time I screwed in the metal bowl. I would talk aloud to the empty kitchen as if there was a huge audience watching me closely and hanging on my every word. The crowd would then stand and applaud as I pulled the hot and gooey chocolate chip cookies out of the oven.
Now I am here everyday at Crushcakes & Cafe, speaking to a real crowd, and I have discovered that, much like when I was 10, I cannot silence myself. I am inspired every day by what I do. And I love sharing it with whoever will listen. My passion has not gone away, ideas sneak up on me suddenly or linger around slowly, patiently, until I stop and pay attention to them. Last Sunday morning I woke up thinking about a new cupcake I wanted to try. We had to do it and right away! I ran into the store, told Rosie my idea and we made it the following day. It was the Mint Mocha Cupcake. Its one of our most popular coffee drinks in the cafe, so why not a cupcake? Rich chocolaty cake made with a shot of espresso, covered in chocolate peppermint frosting and topped off with crushed candy canes. Sounds delicious right??
A few months ago I was in Sonoma and had a Croque Monsier for lunch at a really cute little cafe. I have been thinking about that sandwich ever since. I wanted to find a way to recreate this classic but I didn’t want it to be just like any other ham and cheese melt. No, this had to be special, kicked up, better then the rest. So I mentioned it to Monk and he says, “Well I do make a damn good ham rub.” Mmmmm, that’s all I needed to hear. I called my meat distributor and told him what I needed. The next day, this beautiful huge ham is sitting in our kitchen, covered in Monks secret spices and seasonings, including brown sugar, honey and he won’t tell me what else. And when it comes out of the oven and he slices that baby up, even vegetarians look on with envy.
And the writing, well it just ties it all together for me. I could not have one without the other. I am inspired by what happens here everyday, by the food, by the people and by my own thoughts. I share it with you because this is my art, all of it. And as a good friend recently told me, sometimes artists may offend, surprise or capture your attention, but hopefully in the end, it will make you think and inspire you in your own lives. Even in some small way. And that is my hope. So keep reading and eating, I’m not going anywhere.
peace.love.food.
SN